I Hear Ya!


My oldest son is oppressed! That’s right his parents, God forbid, suggested he join the Robotics club. The kid says he wants to be an Aero Space Engineer, yeah I said the same thing, where the hell did that come from? Both his parents barely passed high school. In fact he left me in the dust in math some where around 5th grade. I usually feigned sleeping or the bubonic plague any time he asked me for help with his math homework. How the hell do you tell a 5th grader I have no clue how to do that. You don’t, so you throw up on his shoes anytime he comes near you with a notebook or even a pencil, that nipped that problem in the bud right away.

Anyway, so he has to go to a meeting that is mandatory but he doesn’t want to go, he throws his temper tantrum saying we forced him to join. We’re such bullies and oppressive parents by actually suggesting he get the hell out of the house. This Robotics Club has its laboratory at the School for the Deaf here in the town I live in. Every kid that goes to the school is deaf, of course my son suffers from selective hearing, but they don’t have a special school for that. Although I’ve learned the school of Slap Across the Back of the Head is a pretty damn good school to solve that issue.

Now I’m driving a 15 year old to this Family Fun Day at this School for the Deaf because his club is going to demonstrate robotics to all the kids there.

This is our first time going to this school so I have no clue where I’m going. My son is pouting in the passenger seat because he does NOT want to go to this meeting. As I pull into the school we are met at the gate by two very nice young ladies who walk up to the passenger side of my car and proceed to sign and speak “Are you going to the pic-nic?” My son, who remember is PISSED that he is being forced to go to this meeting, mumbles ”Yeah” but it comes out like YMmmpppohghh, I don’t even know what the freak he said, so these girls assume because he can’t talk he’s deaf and all talking goes out the window and they start signing directions to us. I don’t know how to tell them my son isn’t deaf he is just a Moron, what’s the sign language sign for that??? Finally after about 20 seconds of what appeared to be exhaustive signing I said No he can hear and they looked at me in a very confused state probably wondering what the hell happened to my son’s tongue. I almost crashed the car I was laughing so hard.

The best part is yet to come after dropping my son off I returned home and told my wife the story, SNOT BUBBLES!!!! She laughed so hard she actually peed in her pants I SWEAR! We got at least 10 minutes of laughing out of that.

Ahhh, thanks EJ for being so oppressed, who knew oppression could be that much fun!!!

Categories : Family Life


  1. Joanne Gagnon says:

    Eric – I absolutely loved it. BTW you and I both have the same son – just different bodies and faces. Keep it up – you are an awesome guy, with awesome talents!!!!!

  2. jimmie says:

    Thats funny!

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